my Hood ( Camden)

camden a place i called home so many times aqain , a place where i had no friends and because of the color of skin and my gender of my body i was going be nothinq but a losee hen layinq some eggs for a negro i didnt know .
So my mother thought she did somethinq by moving me out the hood giving me a taste of the good lifee . livinq poor in a rich neiqhborhood and mr rodgers didnt live down the street but a couple miles away . cause yet trying hard to keep up with the trends when my mom had gas and electric bills . wanting the finer thinqs in life that she offered to me but yet i could only see them on magazines and store windows , but yet she took me out the hood and made a better life for me .
so i go and live in a new place where people like me talk a little different and i see different races cause yet i was used to the urban area . city girl forced to live a life she didnt plan on . the hood was all she knew but yet that didnt take that long to erase out of her head . yes yes yes . cause she or i quickly reformed to the proper speaking girl . who didnt care what the world though of ne thing about her . shoes wasnt busted but they wasnt the best . had nice and decent clothes but isnt wasnt like the others girls . to niqquas on the street i was livinq the best of both worlds .
finding myself once agian wanting what i couldnt afford . jordans and hollister shirts that my mom couldnt buy .
so now she sticks me back in the ghetto i onced called home . faced to be different once again but here they look just like me . no dreams or goals but yet they smile at their own failure . not knowing that there is somethinq out there better for them and me . is this god brinq me back to save the city or atleast the people i can .
or is this another test im willing to fail on to face man kind once again with that devilish grin and say i tried but was it my best they ask & i strug my shoulders saying to myself naa but they really dont know .
it isnt the fear of camden city that scared me . its the umwritten books on our lives . the common welfare given up and the government throwinq checks at us as if that is all we are worth . the broken dreams of the sick and dead . the unheard sad song of the common crackhead . oor the cry for help from he.she that works that nine to five to support hers and many others . so drops weapon and pick up love , cause yet camden isnt the worst were just broken into nothing .!

a simple girl forced to be somethinq she isnt , crying cause yet she has nothing but herself and thats atleast how she feels inside . family you cant pick em and her so called friends you cant miss them . fullfiled you would think when you seen her big smile and the love thst she instill in her hugs and kisses .
the hope in her eyes you wouldnt understand the pain in her heart , longing for the unconditional love . the black on black lovee - the love that without a doubt he will stay ; the love that runs longer then the nile and deeper then the oceans bottom . so she on the conquest to find what yet she longinq for and falls short every time but maybe its her destiny cause yet she isnt that big and her poems arent that great - but yet her heart biqqer then the sun & loves more then the word itself .
so she press on after every mishap and let down cause yet she was a brown girl so she knew what to expect l. the color from her skin bleed on her paper from her determination - stop by the road blocks that say she couldnt and the family that gave up on her and say she wouldn .
her destiny based on peoples opinoin of her and not her heart ; good grades but yet she still comes up short - not knowing what too do cause they dont put on tv the positive imaqe of the girl just the ones that she self incriminates herself in .
selling her self short for some guy just to say he loves her . never really had a father figure to care and the one that did , died in 2003 and so did she emotionless she stand fighting back tears cause yet she cant get him back . not appericating him while he was here so now she fight for the love once again to reoccure in her lifee - only one that she felt believed her kicked her out on her ass , not thinking about the future or her pass ; but yet she knows her destiny & how bright the future will be
because when i look in the mirror and see that girl . i realize that the girl is ME .

jailed

The Newspapers that cover the urban stories to the magazine that writes the articles . we are just to them as monkeys as we were in the early 1800s man i look around and as they jailed like cadqe animals . rip from out dignity only to pass no hopes unto us . giving us every right not to push on and move forward .
sitting in there waiting for his chance at sunlight knowin it will be i while making excuses for himself , tell himself that he is unloved that why his family doesnt come around , shamed by what he did so they forget about him . letters gets scares and the only thing that he has now is himself , not wanting to confine into religion so he indugles his head into the books . Readinq is power so they said . so every night he thought that he won one fight by education himself .
phone calls not accepted cause yet thst girlfriend of his isnt his anymore
forced to care for a child all on her own . at night it seem so cold that even with another mans around around her she cant seem to find heat . stuck to just try to make cause her babydad cant fake it . he is in jail . telling the same story as the next man that he was innocent . but hey i wouldnt know cause i am only the story teller right now .
times get hard in the pin so he washes his fce , fights his way only for a little respect . but he locked up like a animal . like maya said i know why the cadqe bird sings . but yet the same hood song that jezzy wrote .